Want (Kobo eBook)
Julie Peters is one of many women who have experienced sexual assault, but she’s one of the few willing to tell the story of what happened after. We know, increasingly, how common and devastating sexual violence is for women, but we don’t always talk about how survivors can recover from the trauma and return to desire, sexuality, trust, and pleasure. This is the story of how Julie did just that. In the years after the assault, Julie was in what she calls the fog of trauma: the colorless, tasteless experience of barely getting through the day. No one—not counsellors, support groups, or other survivors— could give her any advice about how to find the desire that could bring her back to joy, intimacy, and connection, so she had to make it up on her own. She tried yoga, meditation, medication, drugs, drinking, eating, not eating, casual sex, and all kinds of other things that sometimes helped and sometimes didn’t. In this genuine, vulnerable, and accessible account, Julie tells the story of getting from the devastation of trauma to living a full life in eight sometimes challenging, often bumbling, and occasionally totally delightful steps. These steps are 1. Survive, 2. Feel, 3. Rage, 4. Forgive, 5. Pleasure, 6. Eat, 7. Sex, and finally 8. Love. We have plenty of stories about the helplessness, frustration, and vengeful feelings that can come up after trauma. Culturally, we have started a conversation about these experiences, and we’re all confused about what this all means for our relationships with each other. We badly need stories of hope, healing, and recovery. Survivors of assault need to know they are not alone, and their loved ones badly want to understand what’s happening to them but don’t always know how to ask. This honest and uncompromising recovery story offers a window into one person’s experience of recovery--plus the happy ending we all need to know is possible after trauma.